Is my basketball coach a little too close to me?
Question by Brooke: Is my basketball coach a little too close to me?
Its my freshman year and our school got new coaches. Theyre husband and wife. The wife coaches varsity and husband coaches jv. Theyre so polite. They give great advice. Theyre in there 20s and they like having a relationship with us outside of basketball. Well, the invites me and my friend allison over to there house a lot to watch film.. and we really do watch fim. But he seems a little weird toward me. His son has a crush on me (hes 7) and he texted me out of no where and was like i wish brock was older.. hed be lucky to have a girl like you.. and in on of our warm up songs it says a girl with a big butt and two bee stings (little boobs) and he said thats about me.. and hes really open with us about sex and sexual jokes… im not really sure if this is normal
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6 Responses to Is my basketball coach a little too close to me?
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Well,
I hate to say it but this is quite common in athletic when you have a coach of the opposite sex. Whether you like it or not the coach will be at any point in time checking out all of you, and with a young mind filled with sexual thoughts and lust this is going to be the outcome. But this really shouldn’t be a problem, just as long as isn’t watching you change, or you go some place with him alone and he starts acting weird. Sexual humor is a part of life, and if anything it makes us feel better about our own sexuality. Just keep a sharp mind when around him and don’t settle for anything you don’t feel comfortable doing.
Hope these words can be of use to you in your daily life!!
Joshua Lewis™
September 20, 2013 at 11:18 pm
I do think you should be happy about having such a good relationship with your coach. Many coaches do not care about their players outside of basketball. I have had the same coach since i’ve started playing basketball. He also tells dirty jokes, has me on facebook and we chat alot. I do believe sometimes coaches are just like that to break that awkward barrier between the coach and player. The more comfortable you are with each other, the more you respect each other. If he has a wife, you should have nothing to worry about. However, if he does anything to make you uncomfortable you should keep your distance and ignore him once in a while to give him a hint that you don’t want anything more than a coach and player relationship.
Amber
September 21, 2013 at 12:13 am
Wtf are you serious. My algebra teacher acted the same way with a lot of girls at my school super friendly…he got one pregnant an is now in prison for enticing a child and statutory rape… Oh and he was the BASKETBALL COACH!! Just keep your eye out… If it was me one more too weird or awkward moment and I’d stop communicating with him outside of practice just say your busy
Steven
September 21, 2013 at 12:32 am
It’s sexual harassment of a minor. Its illegal and unethical. The legal definition of harrasment includes things like sex jokes and body comments that make you uncomfortabke, which obviously all this does or you wouldn’t be mentioning it. Here’s what I would do. First, get some distance. You don’t have to make up excuses to no longer be going over to his house. But as for his harassing comments, you can think about reporting him. This is unacceptable behavior in a teacher. You could go to a counselor and say you want to ask some hypothetical questions, like, ” If I knew a teacher who was saying x y z, would that be harassment? What would happen to the teacher and to me if I reported such a teacher, although I’m not saying I do?” The counselor is trained in the law and ethics of the situation. If you name the coach, the counselor has an obligation to report it. So don’t until you’re ready. But besides yourself, realize that a guy who is making sex jokes to underage girls has a problem and probably does it to lots of girls. Maybe you don’t owe them anything, but if no one reports him, what happens? Also, what’s the distance between comments and a physical move? I don’t know. He could just be ignorant or raised to think he’s being funny. Which he isnt. Or he could have much more serious ideas in mind. You have to protect yourself.
Good,luck. As a basketball player you deserve respect, not harassment.
Answer Dancer
September 21, 2013 at 12:35 am
Well how old are you?
ToeeKnee
September 21, 2013 at 1:00 am
I think you should tell him that you dont feel comfortable with him telling sexual jokes and references, if you feel uncomfortable talk to your parents.
Domination
September 21, 2013 at 1:40 am